BIG MEMORIAL

By Your BIG MEMORIAL Day Supporter, Jack Strap

Before we get into the Round Round Robin's Been Hacker Bob-Bob Bob'in Along Tournament, let's take a BIG MEMORIAL moment to remember those who have died while serving our country & say a prayer of life for those who are within harms way today. Also join me in Welcoming Hoooo Shot JR to the HHI BLOG & as our historic 50th subscriber, Hacker Bob has graciously agreed to give JR his snappy convertible, although Da Hacker also agreed to give it to Who Killed Kenny for his historic 50th Birthday this weekend & I heard Kenny drove home in a motorized wheelchair. Anyway, back to the 4 x 4/5 x 2 (i.e. Teams x Players x Courts) Tournament:
* BIG 5-0's = Captain Kenny, Holiday Bill Ruth, What About Bob, Pistol Pete, and Adam Bomb
* BIG Macs = Coach Bill Mac, Alan "The Question" I-Vath-son, Stay-Puff Marshmellow Man, and Your BIG MEMORIAL Day Supporter
* Mighty BIGS = Captain Mighty Kerr, Swoop, "The EX" Smoker Bob, Iron Mike, and Ian Rocks
* The Notorious BIG = Captain Sheriff Hacker "BIGGY Small" Sponge Bob Square Little Yao Pants, Scholesinator, Hoooo Shot JR, and DJ Jazzy Jones

Round 1 saw the BIG Macs defeating The Notorious BIG as Your BIG MEMORIAL Day Supporter scored the winning shot Answer off of a nice fastbreak feed from The Question. Elsewhere, it was the BIG 5-0's winning a tight one for Kenny over the Mighty BIGS on a BIG MEMORIAL Holiday putback by Holiday Bill Ruth.

The Stink'in Losers switched courts for Round #2 and hoped the change of scenery would help. Before these contests--this reporter noted that the Mighty BIGS sub was Pee'in, but Swoop politically corrected me as it was Ian. Then the Mighty BIGS were supersized by the BIG Macs on back-to-back deuces by Your BIG MEMORIAL Day Supporter. The scenery change also didn't help The Notorious BIG who went down to the BIG 5-0's on a BIG MEMORIAL Holiday Bill Ruth shot.

So Round #3 featured the Battle of the Unbeatens, but first I must report that deep in the Stink'in Losers Bracket--it was the Mighty BIGS defeating The Notorious BIG after which Swoop noted they woulda-coulda-shoulda been 3-0. But the BIG 5-0 is the new 3-0 and they wanted me to be writing a Storybook ending for the Birthday Boy Kenny, only thing is that the BIG Macs spoiled the party by Killing Kenny while he sat helpless on the bench while Your BIG MEMORIAL Day Supporter banked in the game-winner.

On to the BIG MEMORIAL Daily Championship Round rematches of Round #1 with the winless Notorious BIG looking to spoil the new Storybook ending of the BIG Macs, but to no avail as the BIG Macs won 11-5 on the 4th straight game-winner by Your BIG MEMORIAL Day Supporter who gave all the credit to his teammates Coach, Vath & Marsh in the post-Daily Championship interview which precluded me from seeing who won the other game?

So with the rain having held off on this BIG MEMORIAL Day, nine players decided to stick around for the Iron Man Finale (IMF). Daily Champions Marsh, Coach, & Your BIG MEMORIAL Day Supporter joined forces with "The EX" Smoker & Ian Rocks to take on What About Bob, Hoooo Shot JR, Scholesinator, Mighty Kerr, and after Kenny begged off & yelled to take one of the "young guys"--none other than "Young" Hacker Bob got out of Kenny/JR's convertible to make it an even 10.

The Daily Champions undefeated day looked to be in jeopardy as they were down 12-7, but then I thought I heard Marsh say "move over Rover, let Stay-Puff takeover" ala Jimi Hendrix. Now I know in "White Men Can't Jump" Wesley Snipes told Woody Harrelson that white guys can listen to Jimi, but they can't hear him, but I trust my eyes (when I have my contacts in) & what I saw was Marsh hitting shots to get us back into it. Then at the end--Coach deflected a pass, I scooped up the loose ball, and hit the only guy who could still run--i.e. Marsh for the fastbreak BIG MEMORIAL IMF Title-winner.

YOU MAKE THE CALL

By Your Athletic Supporter, Jack Strap

Sinking Spring welcomed HHI this morning with a major renovation of their courts as they continue to try to woo us away from Da Hills. They also sent Forrest Gump out with his white gloves to tell us that "life is like a box chocolates", although they would have melted in today's heat. The courts got high marks except for a couple of very important elements--unforgiving rims & relatively small (vs. Da Hills) backboards that made a couple guys look worse than normal. YOU MAKE THE CALL regarding a permanent move there, but my vote is to wait for Da Hills Hoops Renewal Project results before making that decision.

Today's Captains were Bank'in Bowers & Knee Scab Phil who divided up these fourteen players as follows:
* Bow Jones Industrials = Captain Bow-Bow-Bowers, Stay-Puff Marsh-mellow Man, What the Heck, DJ Jazzy Jones, Coach Bill, Radon Rader, and Scholesinator
* Philly Cheese Steaks = Captain Phil, Ian Rocks, "The EX" Smoker Bob, Iron Mike, Sheriff Hacker Sponge Bob Square Little Yao Pants, Mighty Kerr, and Your Athletic Supporter

Bow Jones Industrials were all business in Game #1 as Philly Cheese Steaks tried to hang around, but were eaten up by a hot as the weather Stay-Puff Marsh-mellow Man. Marsh-mellow toasted them (ironic pun intended) & left me wondering why I sent him those Mapquest directions to Sinking Spring. So I ask you if you were in my size 12 shoes & could foresee the aforementioned happening to you, would you have given him those directions--YOU MAKE THE CALL?

Philly Cheese Steaks didn't have enough sizzle in Game #2 either to avoid defeat again--this time on a Coach deuce, but the entertainment level picked up there & continued into Game #3 with a running YOU MAKE THE CALL dialogue between Joey Crawford Heck & Hacker Yogi Strom. It was good that the YOU MAKE THE CALL point-counterpoint entertainment picked up as it was just in time as the entertainment level of the actual play melted like cheese on a steak as the frying pan was hot. The end result was another advance for the Bow Jones Industrials as they hit a Daily Championship sweep high.

So that just left the Iron Man Finale (IMF) with the youngest guy (Marsh) & wisest guy (Hacker) departing. Before the game, Captain Phil announced his Cheese Steaks were going to keep playing until they won which either motivated them to win or Bow Jones to lose & get out of the hot kitchen. YOU MAKE THE CALL, but either way the Philly's garnered a convincing 15-7 IMF Title victory.

RELAY FOR LIFE IRON MEN

By Your Athletic Supporter, Jack Strap

HHI had a Top 10 players in action @ Da Hills on a rare Sunday AM affair including a Big 3 (Mighty, Swoop & me) who woke up early Friday morning & then stayed awake until the RELAY FOR LIFE was over and they were home around 1pm Saturday. So ever the shrewd drafter, Captain Sheriff Hacker Sponge-Bob Square Little Yao Pants picked all (3) of the sleep-deprived. Hacker Bob also ignored the Surgeon General's report that a year of heavy smoking takes 2 years off your life and selected the "The EX" Smoker Bob who using that formula is approaching Centenarian status. Hacker himself is near or at a Psychedelic Sixty+/- and wouldn't have even been on the court except for Weight Watchers.

So that "Dazed & Confused" squad took on "Coach's Cocka-Roaches" who featured the young & athletic Steve-Roller What the Heck, a well-rested (from months away from HHI) Alan "The Question" I-Vath-son, that speciman Radon Rader, Iron Mike (who slept in his own bed Friday/Saturday), and Da Coach.

On paper it looked like a bit of a mismatch, but that's why we play the games. Game 1 saw the "Cocka-Roaches" take an early lead before Your Athletic Supporter put in back-to-back deuces on Automatic Pilot from his favorite spot to get "Dazed & Confused" back in the game. Swoop followed that up by Swooping on Automatic Pilot to keep D&C close, but at the very end--D&C's tank was "running on empty" to quote Jackson Browne and Coach's Cocka-Roaches got the "W".

"Dazed & Confused" tanks were running on fumes in Game 2 and they were falling behind when Big Bob gave the "Robert Horry" secret signal to "take it up a notch". Steve Nash wasn't there so D&C put the bulls-eye on Alan I-Vath-son whose son was there to painfully watch Dad take the following "shots":
* D&C yelled "look it's Stiff Rich" which distracted AI enough to have him catch Heck's hard pass with his nose & mouth drawing blood
* Unlike Hockey, HHI has no 5 Minute Major for drawing blood--so Olde Time Hockey Defenseman Mighty followed that with a "shiver" that sent AI back to his "cut-man" (who formerly worked for the Bayonne Bleeder--Chuck Wepner)
* I heard (pun intended) that Swoop used his ear to again nail AI in the schnoz, garnering a D&C award for most creative use of a body part
* And last but not least, Your Athletic Supporter blocked a couple of his shots to the horror of AI's son and to avoid further abuse AI purposely shot a ball out of bounds so it wouldn't be swatted into the HHI cheap seats.

All of the above could have turned Game 2 around for "Dazed & Confused", but unfortunately "The EX" Smoker had targeted the wrong guy as during all this goonery, What the Heck was busy Steve-Rolling D&C with a variety of vicious shots & I'm talking about the kind of shots that register on the scoreboard. Thus Coach's Cocka-Roaches took home the Daily Championship.

By then the ominous clouds & rain had cleared into gorgeous sunshine, just like at Friday/Saturday's RELAY FOR LIFE & in time for the IRON MEN Finale. There was a certain pride that the RELAY FOR LIFE IRON MEN from Dazed & Confused had in wanting to win this game, but they needed & got a lot of help from "It's All About the Bobs". But Heck/AI/Rader/Iron/Coach were Cocka-Roaches, so they were going to give Dazed & Confused No Quarter (a Led Zeppelin double shot) and were determined to snuff out a Storybook ending for the IRON MEN. What Coaches Cocka-Roaches hadn't counted on was that Steve Nash really was @ Da Hills in Mighty Kerr's body when he made a brilliant pass to set-up Hacker Bob for a "majestic" banking deuce that gave Dazed & Confused the IRON MEN FINALE Title.

Now I know you're excited about the IRON MEN's title, but calm down & pay attention. Da Hills Memorial Weekend parade is next Saturday, so we are moving to the Sinking Spring Fire Co. Courts on Saturday @ 9am. Then we will return to Da Hills on Monday @ a new time for the Holiday = 8:30am.

FLASHBACK RAMBLINGS OF A TWISTED MIND

By Your Relay for Life Supporter, Jack Strap

After 18 hours of this year's Relay for Life and a much needed shower & nap--yours truly is sitting here wondering just what I'll end up writing. It will be interesting for me to do this, but let me warn you that I expect this will be FLASHBACK RAMBLINGS OF A TWISTED MIND, so proceed with caution.

FLASHBACK to my check of the latest weather report before departing for the Relay and seeing a forecast that worried me. I'm not exactly the camping type and if that forecast would have ended up being correct, those 18 hours would have been a bit like the game-show "Survivor" to me. When I arrived at Schuykill Valley, amongst a plethora (I've always liked that word) of dark clouds, the sun somehow shined through. I immediately had a FLASHBACK to our 1st year at The Relay when that very same thing miraculously happened. As I departed the car & despite the ominous weather forecast for Friday/Saturday, I weirdly felt it was important that I grab my sunglasses & was happy I had called my wife to bring the sunscreen. Who knew I would miraculously get so much use out of them.

FLASHBACK to around 6pm Friday & Team Poletti's very own Kara (hope I spelled that right) Wojo-Mojo performing a beautiful rendition of our National Anthem, and then it was time for "The Cancer Survivor's Walk". In previous years, I didn't remember (although generally, my TWISTED MIND Memory isn't very good) them saying all the Survivor's names, but when they announced "Diane Poletti--3 Years", I had FLASHBACKS to Steve telling me about Diane's breast cancer & that very emotional 1st Relay when her health situation was still up in the air. And although we are optimistic about Steve's prostate cancer, when I saw him walking that lap for the 1st time ever, a little fear crept into my MIND and I wished we already had that favorable post-proton report.

RAMBLING on here, Brother Craiger & I traded some calls as he slowly navigated his way around a very bad accident on the West Shore 422 Bypass, but at least he was traveling with butterscotch krimpets. Besides the better than expected weather, it was also comforting for me to see such a good turnout of young & old alike at the Poletti Family & Friends tent on Friday Night including my Karen & Britty who just completed her 1st year at All-Britt as we now call it. Also my pal Paul/Mike "Bank'in" Bowers made it out for the always stunning & surreal Luminaries ceremony, although as I walked the track during that--it was uncomforting to see so many "In Memory Of" bags & hopefully our Team's efforts will contribute to changing that in the future.

Speaking of walking the track, Mighty Monica was our track-walking MVP as she put in many more than her fair share of laps, and this is a good segue (not to be confused with a segway which would have made those laps easier) into the competition portion of this event for those of you scoring at home (e.g. Quick & Magnum). The 1st event was an interesting new one: "The Wacky Horse Races" which featured pedaling devices. Team Poletti had 3 squads of 4 entered in this with over 20 teams playing. After the 1st heats of 3 Teams racing at a time, 2 of our Teams finished 2nd (although that eliminated them) and the old school team of Yours Truly-Wojo-Craiger-Swoop was moving on to the 2nd Round, except that there was no 2nd round as the horses which were engineered more for kids than adults had to be "put down to pasture" as they unfortunately say.

Along about 1:30am Saturday, it was on to the traditional Tug-Of-War which the old school Team Poletti had never won (although Young School Polettis were the defending Champions). The good news was that this year's rules allowed up to 15 tuggers, so we could all tug together (you know what they say--if you can't beat'em, join'em). We had a nice Team mix and although we didn't have our traditional anchor Magnum (who we tried to call?), Craiger was a more than able substitute. After our 1st tug, the MC Judge fittingly hit the "that was easy" button, but the 2nd round was a bit more of a tussle (or would that be a "tuggle"?) although we won again. On to the Finals vs. the Reading Hospital in a best 2 out of 3 for the intercontinental title. The 1st fall was not easy as we earned ground, then lost a little, but our stamina pulled us through. The 2nd tug was tough too, but we won just a bit easier for the Tug-Of-War Championship. In my FLASHBACK RAMBLINGS OF A TWISTED MIND it was loosely reminiscent of Raging Bull when Jake LaMotta (i.e. Reading Hospital) said to Sugar Ray Robinson (i.e. Team Poletti): "I never went down Ray, you didn't get me down", but you didn't win either & that's-a-fact Jake.

The next period of hours were tough ones as I FLASHBACK to being tired & cold, but thanks to Iron's portable heater--it was bearable. During this time period, Poletti pulled a "Gatsby's" (inside PSU joke) as he badgered Mighty & me into leaving the heater to team with him in a 3-legged race, in which we failed badly (but had a little fun) while Young Team Poletti were the victors.

It's now FLASHBACK time for the Main Event as the 2-time defending Champions took the Volleyball Court led by our Coach Reitzy who told us during hours of excruciating practices in advance that "if you can volley a wrench, you can volley a ball" (to paraphrase from the movie Dodgeball). This paid off as right upfront in the Tournament--our Team of Scholesy, Swoop, Craiger, Mighty, Your Relay Supporter, and our Ringer (Reitzy's nephew) won Rounds 1 & 2 (back-to-back in a 6 Teams Bracket that must have looked like Ross' bracket from Reitzy & My Batchelor Party).
So we then watched Young Team Poletti (i.e. a great group of kids) also advance in the Winner's Bracket, as well as a lot of very interesting Stink'in Losers Bracket games, but ultimately it was Poletti 1 (that's us) vs. Poletti 2. Poletti 2 fought gamely & it was close early on in the 1st match, but ultimately the balance & positioning of our players (that's good coaching) prevailed in Game 1. Then the 2-time "Champions of the World" made it a 3-Peat while playing their best game of the Tourney.

RAMBLING on--the next hours FLASHBACK as tired ones in very windy but sunny conditions, although there was a spark from Ross' appearance to deliver the remaining contribution from his very successful TX Hold'em Poker Tourney last weekend. He also participated in the Frozen T-Shirt event which was won by Team Poletti's young Dominic. In addition, "Kick Save" Christine won the Scavenger Hunt game. In fact, our Team swept all the events I can remember except the Hay Bails toss which we would have won if Hey, (DD) Bales had showed up. I also understand that Lipper sold the winning ticket for our $500 Shopping Spree Raffle.

I somehow made it to the very end (had been within 10-15 minutes of that previous years) when they announced the Relay Teams' performance & awards. Our pals, the Werley-Wongs (Kathy & Harry's team) got the luminarias' sales award. As expected, Reading Hospital raised the most money (I'm recalling $11K) for the cause to date, but it's not over until August and we are in 2nd place with like $9K which was well above the very respectable $5K we raised last year. So a great job by all those who contributed to Team Poletti & Special Thanks to our Captains Steve Swoop & Diane-dretti Poletti.

And if you made it this far in my FLASHBACK RAMBLINGS & you liked it, then you likely have a TWISTED MIND too.

In addition--if there's any FLASHBACKS of yours that I missed, don't hesitate to RAMBLE them directly into the Comments section of this BLOG.

BEAT PETE & CANCER POKER BENEFIT

By Your BEAT CANCER Supporter, Jack Strap

Yours truly was under the weather last night with a runny nose & scratchy throat (probably from allergies) causing incessant coughing, but you have to suck it up when you have an opportunity to BEAT PETE & CANCER. Especially when Ross & Karen D put so much effort into what turned out to be a tremendous CANCER BENEFIT Fundraiser. This Texas Hold'em BENEFIT raised over $4K for Team Poletti & to put that in perspective--last year all of our Team's fundraisers totaled a bit more than a very respectable $5K.

There were well over (50) POKER players in this BENEFIT Tournament played at the Sly Fox in Royersford including HHI/TCFL's F'in Ross, Swoop, Iron Mike, Lipper, Chucky Boy, and Your BEAT CANCER Supporter plus Scholesy was there as a "Heckler" to lend support. The event also featured additional chips buy-in (raising additional monies for the cause), table sponsors (more BENEFIT), a variety of door prizes (including free psycho-analysis by Ross), drink tickets, and a nice spread of appetizers & Sweet Street desserts.

So I knew about "I BEAT Zeke", the Reading Eagle's weekly NFL contest, but needed to find out about BEAT PETE. Turns out PETE is a friend of Ross' who is big-time into Texas Hold'em playing regularly on-line & another guy told me he's considering the POKER Tour, so I guess that would make him the BEAT PETE & CANCER BENEFIT Favorite.

The pre-tourney "random" drawing had the (4) Reading-based TCFL/HHIers at the Sweet Streets Table (there were 7 tables in total) going up against (4) other players. Chuck was playing elsewhere as rumor has it that he begged Ross not to put him up against us Polettis' Super Bowl of POKER "pro's". Actually turns out us "pro's" had a lot to learn about the intracies of TX Hold'em regarding betting (e.g. minimum bets go up on the turn & river vs. the flop, raising minimums, etc.) from a real "POKER Pro" at our table who obviously plays more than the once or twice a year that we do.

Regarding my POKER BENEFIT performance, my nap-interrupted viewing of The 2005 Super Bowl of Poker yesterday afternoon didn't seem to help. I did learn from our POKER Pro that I should be happy to see bad cards (e.g. I saw 7 & 2 three times) & fold when I'm not in the ever-increasing blinds, but although I understood what he was saying--I didn't feel happy to not play so often. When I finally did have a really good starting hand of pocket Queens, thought I had Lipper for a big pot, but he got a 3rd 8 on the River to drown me. Later (after a bunch more "happy" folds) I went head-to-head with the POKER Pro as we both went "All In" for a $2500+ pot that could have really got me back in the game. I had him beat as we showed our cards, but the river came up with the only card that could nullify that, a 5 for a rare straight on the table that created a "split pot". A little while later--I played for a straight, probably overbet, thus ended up having to go "All In" & then Out when I didn't get it as the 2nd person eliminated at our SS Table.

So atleast as a POKER Reporter, this gave me the opportunity to wander around & observe the action at all the tables, keeping my most watchful eyes on the HHI/TCFLers. Lipper was the 2nd of our group to be eliminated on one of many exciting head-to-head All Ins that I ended up seeing. Ross was the next to be knocked out, but I missed that and although Chuck was doing real well for awhile there, he eventually succumbed to one of the many serious POKER players. On the other hand, Swoop & Iron made the "merger" as the tables consolidated down to 3. Iron ultimately bowed out after a very respectable performance, so that just left Swoop Poletti who "merged" yet again as it went down to 2 tables.

Thus Po-letti deserves a seperate paragraph. In observing his play closely--I'd say he was very focused & determined, as well as displaying a real POKER face. At one point when he needed to make a stand to try to get back into it as he was relatively short-stacked, he went head-to-head "All In" with none other than BEAT PETE. Very dramatic stuff as they both flipped over an Ace & an 8 to split the pot. But I'll say that hand took a lot out of BEAT PETE as he went down shortly thereafter, thus Swoop BEAT PETE just like he's going to follow Diane-dretti Poletti's lead by BEATING CANCER. Not long after that though, Poletti's "Cinderella POKER Story" came to an end with a 13th place finish vs. some of the best POKER players in the Tri-County area.

We didn't stick around to see who amongst the "Dealing Dozen" prevailed, but it didn't really matter because the Big Story was the monies raised for the American Cancer Society by the BEAT PETE & CANCER POKER BENEFIT. Great Job Ross & Karen.

DAILY DOUBLE DEUCE (3D)

By Your Athletic Supporter, Jack Strap

Please join me in welcoming Eric "Stay-Puff" Marsh-mellow Man to the HHI BLOG as he is our 49th member (What the Heck could be #50 if his new job comes with a computer). Marsh--this is the 94th report in this HHI BLOG series & we expect that by next week, you'll have read them all so you're ready for your HHI-AT to Test your Aptitude regarding Hills Hoops Inc. To help you, here's a few sample questions:
* What was Old School holding when Commish Collin got Quick to sign "The Agreement"?
* Why did Connor Magnum transfer to Wilson?
* Who is playing with Proton Power?

Anyway--Marsh & FUn Frank were selected as today's Captains, and they in turn selected these virtual franchises:
* The I's of Marsh = Captain Marsh, Swoop, Magnum, "The Ex" Smoker Bob, Mighty Kerr, and Your Athletic Supporter
* Kung FU = Captain Frank (Not the HHI Hall of Famer, rather his son), Sargent Carter, Steve-Roller What the Heck, Scholesinator, Iron Mike, and Sammy Red Shoes

Game 1 featured swarming defenses which were harming to the offenses, but eventually it came down to a final shot to win it as it always does. Just before Magnum released a late DEUCE from the corner, I heard Swoop say "that's not really his spot". But Magnum, who had been looking hard for "his spot" all game long, found it in that corner for the game-winning DEUCE for the I's of Marsh.

But in Game 2--everybody was Kung FU fighting, those cats were fast as lightning, it was a little bit frightning, but Kung FU did it with expert timing while tying the DAILY Championship Series at one game a piece.

So it all came down to the DAILY Championship game as the fans continuously streamed into Da Hills--one guy with a Wilson hat actually was so mesmerized by HHI that he wondered on to the court, although I think he was looking for Connor Magnum. Diggetty Doug Bales did a drive-by without shooting as Dr. Swoop reported that he is on HHI Injured Reserve with a pulled 5th gutt-atarsal, but I digress. The I's of Marsh were playing like there is no "I" in Team or Marsh as they led 14-10. But as Heck said after the game: "shot selection is easy when you're down 4 late" and on Kung FU's final 2 possessions, you needed 3D glasses to really appreciate his DAILY DOUBLE DEUCE for the Championship.

Next week is the Relay for Life and all HHIers are invited to stop out to see Team Poletti at Schuykill Valley High School on Friday Night or Saturday AM. So Hills Hoops will be moved to Sunday @ 9am where we'll play The Farewell Game for World B. Frito Ski who is moving to Texas--the Home of the Proton Beam.

CINCO DE HILLS-O HOOPS

By Your Athletic Supporter, Jack Strap

It was CINCO DE HILLS-O HOOPS in Wyomissing HILLS as they were thrilled to have HHI back @ Da HILLS-O & welcomed us with painted backboards, new nets, and a HILLS-O Neighborhood yardsale. Regarding the latter, Who Killed Kenny had a big spread of high quality junk & Sargent Carter told me that Quick was manning up the yardsale table at his house. I envisioned the "QM Ball" on "sale" for double what Quick paid for it and a kid asking him if the ball could be used inside & outside? And Quick replying "Kid, this ball has been used both inside & outside" (would you call that an inside joke or an outside joke?). Commish Wojo-Mojo couldn't make it for CINCO DE HILLS-O HOOPS as he was Commissionering the Wyomissing Fishing Rodeo @ The Stone House, but we'll see him soon.

Coach Bill & Mighty Kerr were named the Captains for CINCO DE HILLS-O HOOPS as an even dozen were in action:
* CINCO or Swim-O = Coach Bill, Swoop, EX-Smoker Bob, Knee Scab Phil, Iron Mike, and Chris Shiery the Science Guy-ry
* Mighty's DE Mayos = Mighty Kerr, Sargent Carter, Magnum, DJ Jazzy Jones, Scholesinator, and Your Athletic Supporter

Coach's squad questioned his picking & appeared to believe they would CINCO (Not Swim-O), and it appeared to be the self-fulfilling prophecy in Game 1 as Mighty's DE Mayos took an early lead & held it all the way up to the point EX-Smoker Bob hit a dramatic deuce to win it 15-14 for Swim-O (Not CINCO). Moral: Things aren't always what they appear to be, especially in HHI.

Your Athletic Supporter knew Big Bob was in a good mood after that Big Shot, so I quickly hit him up to buy Relay for Life $500 Shopping Spree Raffle Tickets & Thanks also to Coach, Magnum, and DJ for contributing to that cause (Note: Raffle Tix will be on sale for the Last Time @ HHI next Saturday).

Mighty's DE Mayos came back in Game 2 to take a commanding 10-5 lead (more on the games later) before yours truly had to depart to go to Phoenixville (note all roads eventually lead there) for the Funeral of my Uncle Harold. I have fond memories of my Uncle Harold who amongst many lifetime achievements rose from an office boy to become CEO & President of Phoenix Steel Corp, but what really impressed me was that he played Golf until the Age of 88. This gives me inspiration that maybe I have another 40 years of HHI?

I would be remiss if I didn't also mention the passing of my Uncle Chuck whose Funeral is tomorrow in Phoenixville. Uncle Chuck (along with my Grandfather & Dad) operated Mahlon K. Miller & Sons Inc. electrical contracting business for over 40 years. Their business was so very well respected in the Phoenixville Area that I can go to Relay for Life Bingo in Birdsboro & strike up a conversation with some ladies who had lived in Phoenixville, and they told me just that about the family business which unfortunately none of us kids kept going.

I promised more on the CINCO DE HILLS-O HOOPS games & I got the Scoop from Swoop on my way to Phoenixville. It turns out that my Mighty's DE Mayos finished off Game 2 with a 15-11 win to tie the series. But in the CINCO DE HILLS-O HOOPS Daily Championship, CINCO or Swim-O ended up doing the back stroke while waving to Da HILLS Crowd as they finished a convincing 15-4 DC Victory. Swoop was thrilled to be a Daily Champion, but modest as he gave credit to his teammates including EX-Smoker Bob & Coach who shot well (rumor has it that Bill used the $6/week he saved on Not playing @ Ozzies on deuce-shooting lessons from Kyle Korver).

Note HHI will return for HILLS HOOPS next Saturday @ 9am when I hope to play in, as well as report on, all the games.

QUICK GETS THE BOOT

By Your Athletic Supporter, Jack Strap

I know some of you (not me) were hoping QUICK GETS THE BOOT means that the Commissioners finally tired of his shenanigans & banned him from HHI. No, that's not the case--rather the Commishes symphatize with his recent injury streak and will disregard his comments below:

Just an update on my "latest" injury.  As Swoop quickly
diagnosed on Sat. I broke my 5th metatarsal bone of my
left foot. I am currently sporting a stylish black boot
and have restrictions to not bear weight for two weeks
and to stay in the boot until I see him again on the
29th. I am undecided on whether to challenge the
validity of the "agreement" signed on Sat. as I was
being held hostage in the lowest form imaginable. 
How could I not trust the "X" Commissioner Collin? 
How could I have known that even he would stoop to the
lowest of lows?  It's a sad day when you cannot even
trust Commish Collin and SOB, I mean OSB! I will be
evaluating my case this afternoon with my brain trust
Dewey, Screwem & Howe! As described in the afore-
mentioned synopsis of the games, there was an obvious
vendetta being played out by several of the players
against myself as they got word of the coerced signed
document, which basically gave them cart blanch
latitude to inflict as much bodily harm on me while
knowingly escaping any recourse from the "House of
Cards" Commissioners Office!

Well, I hope you are all satisfied, because even if
I win a possible lawsuit, you have now made me
question whether or not I can continue to jeopardize
any future attempt to play in this thug infested
league.  I will have to sit down with my family and
review any decisions about my future participation.
I am hoping that the Commissioner will take a hard
look at what has transpired over the last few weeks
and hopefully try to root out the criminal element
that has recently grown within the league!  I
obviously do not want to accuse one person of this
turnaround, but I can't help to mention that the
blatant fouls have increased significantly since
Sgt. Carter has returned to the court. That's just
an observation that I'm sure would've/will be
uncovered during the investigation!