LAST IN, FIRST OUT (LIFO)

By Your Athletic Supporter, Jack Strap

FIRST things FIRST, an HHI Organizational Announcement that was actually the LAST thing this AM at a post-game press conference in Adamstown after our final run at the Y-M-C-A: Bank'in Bow-Bow-Bowers is IN as our new Director of INdoor Basketball (DINB) relating to the new multi-week deal he negotiated for HHI with Pastor Ray at the Grace Fellowship Church including a new top coat on the floor. Note though that Lipper is Not OUT, but rather he was redeployed as HHI's Director of Church League (DCL). Bowers celebrated by being the FIRST OUT (FO), well before the press conference and without paying in a classic "Hoop & Dash" move.

Today's LIFO Captains were Hoooo Shot JR & What the Heck who selected these virtual franchises:
* Steve-Rollers = Captain Steve-Roller Heck, Steve Swoop, Iron Mike, Quick Mike, and Jack Strap
* JR. Achievement = Captain JR, Gary US Bonds, EX-Smoker Bob, Magnum, and our new DINB: Bank'in Bowers
* 11th Man Rover = Mighty Kerr

Game 1 found Your Athletic Supporter feeling groggy after having overslept--waking at 6:48am & rushing to the "Y" to arrive as the LAST IN (LI). Somehow this helped his game as he hit (2) deuces & a couple of driving hoops in the Steve-Rollers victory.

{Warning: Accounting content}
So now that we know who was the LAST IN & FIRST OUT, let's pause to note that LIFO (LAST IN, FIRST OUT) is a method of inventory valuation that assumes that items purchased or produced LAST are the ones that are used or sold FIRST. LIFO is an allowable method under U.S. GAAP (Generally Accepted Accounting Principles), but the International Accounting Standards (IAS) disallowed the use of LIFO in favor of FIFO (FIRST IN, FIRST OUT) or weighted average cost methods. This could be very important if/when Accounting Standards converge into one global standard with pressure to do that being driven by the fact that we operate in a global economy.

Game #2 saw JR. Achievement coming back strong led by their Hoooo Shot Captain while taking a 14-10 lead only to watch in horror as Heck scored on a drive, Strap on a corner deuce, and Steve-Roller on another 2-ball to win it for the Steve-Rollers.

The third game of the Series saw JR. Achievement with their backs up against the wall figuratively & literally in the claustrophobic YMCA gym, but they jumped to another lead. But But (don't you Love or Hate that dreaded Double But) the Steve-Rollers made a frantic late run that put JR. Achievement on the precipice of defeat down 14-13. But But But (an unprecedented Triple But) Gary US Bonds nailed the final deuce to give JR. Achievement the dramatic victory, although there were complaints by Quick of illegal substitution leveled at our new DINB--Bowers.

Game 4 was another hard fought affair, but when it came down to the end it was our local celebrity Iron Mike--who appeared this week on Berks Dance Fever or maybe it was some other show on BCTV--who hit the Daily Championship winning shot for the Steve-Rollers. It should also be noted that the Roving Mighty Kerr was also 3-1 at this point, thus also awarded a DC. This was important as the DC's paid $5 while the Stink'in Losers paid $6 except for DINB Bowers who "Hooped & Dashed" (Bank'in, you owe Swoop).

The Iron Man Finale (IMF), in what might very well be our last game ever (never say never) at the Adamstown YMCA, saw JR. Achievement with the Mighty Kerr winning the IMF Title with DINB Bowers long gone by then.

HHI DOES MORE BEFORE 9am.....

By Your Athletic Supporter, Jack Strap

We're not exactly the Army, but HHI DOES MORE BEFORE 9am than most people do all day & they were back doing it at the Adamstown YMCA this morning. First a little History on the YMCA:
The Young Men's Christian Association was founded in London, England, on June 6, 1844, in response to unhealthy social conditions arising in the big cities at the end of the Industrial Revolution.
You can read more about the YMCA's History at the link below and if you page down all the way to the end of it, they'll probably have added a paragraph about the infamous Hills Hoops Inc. playing there the last two weeks
http://www.ymca.net/about_the_ymca/history_of_the_ymca.html

Today's "Y" Captain/Coach were Radon Rader & Coach Bill who carefully selected these Teams:
* Raders of the Lost Arc (note "Arc" as in Shot) = Captain Rader, What the Heck, Gary US Bonds, Iron Mike, and Mighty Kerr
* Coach Beli-chuck up a Deuce = Coach Bill, Swoop, EX-Smoker Bob, Quick Mike, and Your Athletic Supporter
* 11th Man Rover = Diggetty Doug Bales

Game 1 saw the Raders of the Lost Arc finding it early as Gary US Bonds in particular burned the vaunted Beli-chuck Defense with smooth arcing deuces in their victory.

Before Game 2, Coach Beli-chuck made some defensive adjustments to create the "Snake Defense" and you know what Indiana Jones' Raders of the Lost Arc say "anything but snakes". On Offense, the creation was Coach Beli-chuck up a Deuce as all members of the Team did so & made enough of them (particularly Swoop) to ultimately prevail on a Jack Strap 2-ball.

So the Teams were tied at 1 game apiece although the Roving DD Bales was still undefeated entering the 3rd game of the Series. This game saw Coach Beli-chuck & duck jump & shoot their way to a nice early lead before What the Heck got Raders of the Lost Arc back into it with (3) straight deuces which was an HHI YMCA court record. But Coach Beli-chucks pounded it down low to Big Bob & the EX-Smoker sent Raders of the Lost Arc to a Temple of Doom defeat.

Game 4 was a chance for Raders Redemption & they meant business but Coach Beli-chucks didn't back down either as they battled tooth-and-nail. At the end of the best game of the day, it was Coach Beli-chucks by 15-14 to take home a share of the "HHI DOES MORE BEFORE 9am....." Daily Championship with a 3-1 record while the Roving Bails also earned a DC share.

In the "Last Crusade" Iron Man Finale it was Coach Belichucks battling Bales & the Bonds-less Raders of the Lost Arc. This game saw Your Athletic Supporter tying Heck's court record with 3 straight deuces as a balanced offensive, defensive & special teams attack led Coach Beli-chucks to the IMF Title.

So as the HHIers departed the "Y" at 9am, this Reporter broke a big HHI story that Steve-Roller What the Heck will be Coaching Football at Kutztown University next year, further demonstrating that HHI DOES MORE BEFORE 9am than most people do all day.

IT'S FUN TO PLAY

By Your Athletic Supporter, Jack Strap

HHI's Y-M-C-A Era began around sunrise in Adamstown with an amazing 18 players turnout (the majority arriving before 7am). Why? Or should that be "Y"? Because as we all knew, IT'S FUN TO PLAY at the Y-M-C-A. The Longest Driving Hacker Bob selected the Captains: Quick Mike, Alan "The Question" I-Vath-son, and Floor Burn Phil who selected these IT'S FUN TO PLAY squadrons:
* The Village People = "Cowboy" Quick, Heck the Leatherman, Police Officer--Sheriff Hacker, JR the Construction Worker, "Military Man" Iron, and Jack "Indian" Strap
* Macho Men = Al Vath, Magnum, Pistol Pete, Coach Bill, Bank'in Bowers, and Pat's Steaks
* Why Oh Y = F.B. Phil, Swoop, EX-Smoker Bob, Ian Rocks (don't tell his Wife that he re-injured his back), Mighty Kerr, and Diggetty Doug Bales (who evidently slept in his van along the side of Rt. 272 after the bars closed)

Being the genius he is, Quick purposely missed the foul shots (you didn't think he could shoot that bad for real did you?), so that The Village People could slip out of their costumes (see team picture below) and scout the other teams:

Round 1 started with the Macho Men & Why Oh Y slowly getting used to their new YMCA surroundings (i.e. smaller court, lines, etc.), but the Macho Men adapted quicker for the "you've got to be a Macho" win. Then The Village People strutted confidently on to the court with their IT'S FUN TO PLAY at the Y-M-C-A music playing in their heads. At first the Macho Men weren't intimidated as they knocked The VP down a peg or 2, but MM's homophobic tendencies set in when The Village People got more aggressive on "D" which created offense including the game-winning deuce by that proud American Indian--Jack Strap. This then gave The Village People enough momentum to defeat Why Oh Y.

Round 2 was deja vu all over again as the Macho Men defeated Why Oh Y (or so I heard as Iron & me were playing Ping-Pong in the YMCA Game Room), only to then suffer a "humiliating" loss to The Village People who then went on to defeat Why Oh Y. The "Groundhog Day" theme then continued thru Round 3 which left Why Oh Y dumbfoundedly asking themselves Why Oh Y are we 0-6?

With The Village People off "Suiting Up" to celebrate their "IT'S FUN TO PLAY" Daily Championship, the Iron Man Finale featured the Macho Men vs. Why Oh Y. Just when it looked like Why Oh Y could get their 1st win, Pat or Magnum (I always get those 2 mixed up) abruptly ended it with a "half court" deuce.

We collected $5/head to easily pay the $60 rental fee with the remainder donated to Team Poletti's Relay for Life, although a disoriented Swoop (losing will do that to you) almost left that & the College Bowls Pool (won for the 2nd straight year by Mighty "The Greek" Kerr) monies for the American Cancer Society behind. Luckily Pat's Steaks (or maybe it was Magnum) spotted the envelope lying on the IT'S FUN TO PLAY at the Y-M-C-A court.

This week amongst what is sure to be a lot of Hoopla (did you catch that, "Hoop-la"), our new Director of Indoor Basketball--The Giant Lipper (although DIB-Magnum was fired, HHI did compassionately give him a nice severance package that allows him to continue to play in HHI) will sign the contract with the Adamstown YMCA which will have us playing there @ 7am on Saturdays until the end of March.

HHI FLASHBACK @ DA HILLS

By Your Athletic Supporter, Jack Strap

It was an HHI FLASHBACK with winter season basketball @ DA HILLS today on what was a pretty nice day. Nine (9) Hardcore Hoopsters were on-hand @ DA HILLS after the Ozzies option was officially eliminated with the squads hand-picked as follows:
* Warm Enough for Shorts = Coach Bill, Bank'in Bowers, Iron Mike, and Your Athletic Supporter
* Luv the Great Outdoors = Quick Mike, Gary US Bonds, Mighty Kerr, and Energizer Boni
* "Some of Us Gotta Work" Rover = Knee Scab Phil

Game 1 started with Quick hitting (2) deuces & stating that he "Luvs the Great Outdoors", but Warm Enough for Shorts got Hot from long-range down the stretch with Bowers Bank putting the double exclamation point (!!) on their victory.

Game #2 saw Warm Enough for Shorts finding it easier to work the ball around for good shots with the "extra Phil" which also allowed them to extend their defense to take away Luv the Great Outdoors' 2-balls. The end result after another Bowers game-winner was another fairly easy win for Warm Enough for Shorts.

But Luv the Great Outdoors got a second wind after that second Warm Enough win and in Game 3 they came back strong with a convincing victory and since it was an HHI FLASHBACK @ DA HILLS, the teams decided to play a Series Finale.

Warm Enough for Shorts appeared confident in winning the Daily Championship in the Series Finale with the "extra Phil", but their shooting % went colder than DA HILLS temperature and Luv the Great Outdoors won it on a Quick-to-Boni-to Quick fast-break lay-up.

So the D.C. was a push to next weekend, probably at the Adamstown Y-M-C-A but stay tuned for a final decision on that.