OLD SCHOOL TOURNEY WON BY WATSONS

By Your Athletic Supporter, Jack Strap

OLD SCHOOL Bruce Masters-fully put together another of his American Cancer Society Relay for Life (ACS-RfL) Golf TOURNEYS yesterday at Da Manor. Yours truly couldn't make it, but the "drive for show" must go on as they were "putting for dough" for the ACS-RfL cause.

Last year's Champions Morton Powder Coatings (MPC) Team including Captain Muggsy Raihl, Golf Ball'in Bowers, Nedster, and "I'm OK, You're OK" Correll was decimated this year by vacation/schedule conflicts & was given little chance of repeating. But their Glenn Correll made a comeback like Tom WATSON's at The 2009 British Open (yea, I'm a closet golf fan after giving up baseball since their 1994 Strike "Out"). Now I'll go off on a tangent--hey atleast I warned you.

When I was a kid my older cousin Linda Freeman got married and on her Honeymoon by chance became friends with Tom WATSON & his new wife. This was before WATSON started beating "The Shark" (no, not Jaws) Jack Nicklaus, but he was an up-and-comer on the Tour and at subsequent Miller Family Picnics, Linda's Father--my Uncle Harold (may he rest in peace) always had golf on & pulling for WATSON to win. So not having any favorite golfers, Tommy WATSON became My Golfer and because of that he went on to win (8) Major Championships. Now pushing 60, WATSON hasn't been competitive to win for years until a couple weeks ago which gets me off my tangent & back to the OLD SCHOOL TOURNEY albeit in a new paragraph.

So our Tommy WATSON, the MPC-retired OK Correll rebuilds the defending Champion MPC Team by recruiting the oldest golfer on our TOUR, Sheriff Hacker Sponge Bob Square Pants along with Marty "Special K" Korecky (last seen collecting money at St. John Baptist De La Salle) & Joe "The Koz" Kozlowski (who "back in the day" was known for his bowling & softball pitching) who collectively we'll call The WATSONS.

So for 18 grueling Manor holes The WATSONS went head-to-head with (3) others Teams to defend that Title, and when the last putt was sink-sank-sunk they were tied at an impressive 10 Under Par (-10) with the OLD SCHOOLS including Bruce, Quick Mike, Diggetty Doug Bails, and Barry & Gary which is a five-some by my math although anything can happen at an OLD SCHOOL TOURNEY. So like Tommy WATSON a few weeks back they went to a playoff, but this was the WATSONS day and the OLD SCHOOL TOURNEY was WON BY The WATSONS in style with a Birdie, thus MPC retains their bragging rights.

Other notables were Longest Drive winners--Giant Lipper & Iron Mike and Closest to the Pins--Old School & Tim who must have been a late add. Others who I think were in golf action on the stink'in loser teams included but are not limited to Swoop, Radon Rader, DJ Jazzy Jones and his friend the Z-Man, Mike Zerfass. Most importantly the OLD SCHOOL TOURNEY raised $185 for the ACS-RfL.

So great job Bruce & for those who couldn't make it this time, there will be a future OLD SCHOOL TOURNEY for you to comeback like WATSON.

CHILDHOOD CHUMS

By Your Athletic Supporter, Jack Strap

It wasn't exactly in the HOOD, but way-way back in the day Commissioner Wojo-Mojo & Diggetty Doug (D.D.) Bales were CHILDHOOD CHUMS in what could very well be the longest running relationship in HHI today? The HHI Commissioner election may be in "nap time" now, but when it was in it's rambunctious stage, we got some insight into Bales & Wojo's CHILDHOOD CHUMS relationship:

Bales: Since my name has been thrown into the debating by Como Wojo campaign manager, I think it only fair to give everybody a few facts as I know them.

1 - Mr. Swoop forgot that I know Wojo longer than anybody else in the HHI. I knew him when he was in 6th grade and copping feels from Alexis. The Monsignoor caught him and he had to marry Alexis, being the "good" catholic boy that he is.

2 - In his early years, Wojo would sit at the ladders by the diving boards at the West Reading pool to look down the girls tops when they came out of the pool.

3 - I have seen him push smaller children out of the way , when the Ice Cream Truck stopped in his neighborhood.

4 - Wojo has also engaged in gambling at Bails' House of Sin.

The man is not without fault, but is an Angel Compared to Quick Mike.

Wojo: Bails....you're killing me. I need to retort a number of your allegations:

1. I was not "copping a feel" of Alexa in 6th grade. Our relationship didn't develop (nor did she) until high school.

2. I learned everything about the West Reading Pool girls from the Bailey boys, who I looked up to while I was looking down those swim suits. Wasn't that just normal? I mean...some of those girls were hot!

3. Do you know how slowly those kids move when the ice cream man is coming down the street? They need to MOVE! I mean...I just hear that truck coming from a couple of blocks away and I'm off!

4. You told me I was donating to a non-profit organization during our card games at your house. You even gave me a receipt. Which I used when I filed my taxes last week. If I get audited....

I smell VICTORY. And I haven't even played the "Quick got his nickname from his wife, if you know what I mean" card. Bring it on.

By the way. The lines on the courts were painted today. Unfortunately, all we could afford was water-based paint so we're back to square one again. Yuk Yuk.

That's great CHILDHOOD CHUMMY stuff and anybody else who has any good "back in the day" stories or a current HHI basketball report, pass them on to yours truly for publication in this HHI BLOG.